Inconsequential Crap

"Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection" (itsalwayssteve) 12/16/2016 at 09:15 • Filed to: corolla, toyota, Worklopnik

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That’s what Fridays are for here at work before the phones start to blow up.

That feeling you’re getting looking at this? James May calls it “The Fizz”

Our Luxury Performance Chase Car (180k mile 2000 Corolla CE) has a sticky key. The brake interlock switch is wonky and too expensive to bother fixing, and one of our drivers keeps leaving the key in the ignition. That kills the battery. So I provided a solution:

I’m considering adding steps every few weeks...

CalzoneGolem > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 12/16/2016 at 09:18

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Include props.

7. Bang dash 3 times with the rubber chicken under the passenger seat.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > CalzoneGolem 12/16/2016 at 09:22

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8. Write “Corolla” on said rubber chicken with the sharpie currently jammed in the drivers side air vent and commence Voodoo rituals.

E90M3 > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 12/16/2016 at 09:24

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Oil field solution: something not working correctly? Get a bigger hammer. Seems like you could try in this situation.

CalzoneGolem > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer 12/16/2016 at 09:27

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9. Cut a hole in a box.

pip bip - choose Corrour > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 12/16/2016 at 09:32

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better still , leave key in ignition and hope it gets stolen.

S65 > E90M3 12/16/2016 at 09:32

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??

E90M3 > S65 12/16/2016 at 09:35

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That’s a bird, gonna need one of these:

a 6 pounder will probably do it.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > CalzoneGolem 12/16/2016 at 09:35

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10. Buy a gumball from the backseat gumball machine.

Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection > pip bip - choose Corrour 12/16/2016 at 09:35

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That hasn’t happened yet. Also due to the cold weather and the fact that the battery is 10 years old, it dies within an hour and a half of sitting with the key in.

I offered to buy it for $400.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > pip bip - choose Corrour 12/16/2016 at 09:38

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Nobody wants it.

On that note, a friend of mine had a (2006-ish??) Kia Spectra that he no longer had any use for... Now the area he worked in was pretty bad for auto theft, in fact right across the road was one of the spots the cops watched. So he left the doors unlocked and the keys in it. Not even a nibble.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 12/16/2016 at 09:39

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Read that as “offered to bury it for $400". I’d do that.

CalzoneGolem > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer 12/16/2016 at 09:41

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11. Open trunk and place gumball under spare. Do not shut trunk.

S65 > E90M3 12/16/2016 at 09:42

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Not just any bird, a Hamerkop

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > CalzoneGolem 12/16/2016 at 09:42

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12. Place dead body gently around gumball.

CalzoneGolem > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer 12/16/2016 at 09:48

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13. Slam trunk closed as hard a possible and run around car three times.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > CalzoneGolem 12/16/2016 at 09:52

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14. Re-enter the car through the sunroof. If no sunroof, use a pickaxe to create one.

PotbellyJoe and 42 others > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 12/16/2016 at 11:16

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Meanwhile if this was a Civic, it would have already been stolen.

Old people don’t steal cars, apparently.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > Steve is equipped with Electronic Fool Injection 12/19/2016 at 10:39

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Replace the battery? Seriously, they usually die after 5-6 years for me.